Adventures in Jobbyhunting

As I’ve been sending out job applications and posting my resume places, I occasionally get an email back from bots or spammers or scammers or things of that nature. This is the email I received the other day:

Good day Jordyn Nolz,

We believe that your knowledge, skill set, and work experience will be among our most valuable assets.

You can earn money sitting in your own home!

No sales, and no chasing down clients, yet big rewards are available with RexTech Ltd.

If you are interested in chance) for(high wages|high earnings|relevant salary|bigger salary amount) independence, and full benefits, please(simply|just|)reply to this message, and our(manager|HR manager)will write you to discuss further the(hiring process|employment opportunity|job description|chance of being employed)in detail.

(To expedite|To accelerate)the(communication|response time)process, please(fill in|complete|write down)the necessary information below:

First name:
Last name:
Country of residence:
Contact phone:
Preferred call time:

(Sincerely|Thank You|Respectfully|Yours faithfully)
(HR Recruiter|HR Manager|HR Assistant)

Nick Rowalsky
RexTech Ltd.

Normally I just delete these immediately because they usually the also involve asking me to click a link for a FREE CREDIT CHECK that I NEED TO DO if I want this job! But this time I decided to send something back:

Dear (Nick | Mr. Rowalsky | Senor Rowalsky | Nick Dogg)

Thank you so much for considering (me | anyone | everyone) for this (exciting | scammy | fake) job opportunity! Before I send you my (information | first born child | contract for soul), I was hoping you could tell me more about RexTech! Do you sell (dinosaurs | robot dogs | misspelled Krogans)?

While (big earnings | money piles | men rainstorms) sound (enticing | fake | not real), I feel it is in my best interest to (gather | collect | steal | coerce out of a person with false promises) information about you first!

===========FORM | THING TO WRITE ON | WORDY STUFFY ============
1. Are you (real | nonfiction)?
2. Hahaha, no you’re not.
===========FORM | THING TO WRITE ON | WORDY STUFFY ============

(Thank you | Muchas Gracias). Please reply soon!

(Sincerely | Love | Don’t Write Back)
(Jordyn | Batman | Mr. President | Sexy in Sacramento)

So far there’s been no reply, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed!

In other job hunting news, I came across this in an ad yesterday:

“At least three (5) years of experience in office work”

The ad was for The Brain Injury Association of Washington.

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